Ig Nobel Prize in Medicine - Masateru Uchiyama (Japan) and his team for "assessing the effect of listening to opera on heart transplant patients who are mice.
Ig Nobel Prize in Psychology - Laurent Legue, Brad Bushman, Oulmann Zerhouni, Baptiste Subra, and Medhi Ourabah for "confirming by experiment that people who think they are drunk also think they are more attractive."
Ig Nobel Prize in Biology / Astronomy - Marie Dacke, Emily Baird, Marcus Byrne, Clark Scholtz, and Eric Warrant for "discovering that when dung beetles get lost they can navigate their way home by looking at the Milky Way."
Ig Nobel Prize in Safety / Engineering - Gustano Pizzo for an extremely complicated method of capturing hijackers by entrapping them and parachuting them to the ground and the waiting arms of the authorities.
Ig Nobel Prize in Physics - Alberto Minetti et al. for "discovering that some people would be physically capable of running across the surface of a pond if it was on the Moon."
Ig Nobel Prize in Chemistry - Shinsuke Imai and his team (Japan) for "discovering that the biochemical process by which onions make people cry is even more complicated than scientists previously realized."
Ig Nobel Prize in Archaeology - Brian Crandall (US) and Peter Shahl (Canada, US) for cooking a shrew, feeding it to a person without letting him chew it, and examining his excrement to see which bones dissolved in the digestive system.
Ig Nobel Peace Prize - Alexander Lukashenko (Belarus) for "making it illegal to applaud in public" and the Belarus State Police for arresting a one-armed man for clapping.
Ig Nobel Prize in Probability - Bert Tolkamp et al. (UK) for determining that the longer a cow has been lying down, the more likely it is to get up and that it's difficult to determine how long it will be until a standing cow lies down.
Ig Nobel Prize in Public Health - Kasian Bhabganada et al (Thailand) for their techniques described in "Surgical Management of an Epidemic of Penile Amputations in Siam" which seem to be effective except when the male member has been partially eaten by a duck.
Photo: The 2013 Ig Nobel Prize is a glass case containing a hammer and a recommendation to use the hammer to break the glass, in case of an emergency.