Stink Bomb Recipes

When I was in college I spent a summer in Seattle living on a trimaran with a friend and taking classes at the University of Washington. My dad made the drive from Nebraska to Washington with me to get me settled, then flew home. We sampled something of everything from Ivars, including fish & chips, crabs, and a bucket of clams. Since the sandhills of Nebraska are all beach with no ocean, the whole experience was novel. My dad wanted to keep souvenirs of the trip, but he didn't have any room for luggage on the plane.

How does this relate to stink bombs? My dad packed away clam and crab shells in my car, so that I could bring them back home for him to keep. The only problem is, he didn't seal them away inside plastic bags. He just hid them away in my car somewhere. I smelled them all summer. In fact, everyone smelled them. I got complaints from people parked next to me in the parking garage. When I got home, my dad had forgotten where he had put the shells. We tore the care apart, but didn't find anything. I vacuumed my car. I shampooed my carpeting, yet I smelled rotting seafood all fall. It wasn't until a boyfriend changed my tire that the 'souvenirs' were discovered, where the jack for my car should have been. So... if you're looking for the perfect stink bomb, I've been-there-and-done-that and can say decomposing crab smells much more heinous than any old Easter egg or burning hair stink bomb. If you don't have dead seafood handy, here's what you do:

Classic Egg Stink Bomb

One version of this results from hiding Easter eggs really well, so that you find them when you're changing the air filter for your air conditioner in the summer. Did you catch my 'I have personal experience' tone? If you want to recreate the stench on purpose you don't have to boil the eggs. Just use a heavyduty pin or needle to poke through the shell of the egg. You can leave the egg in the sun to putrefy, wrapped in foil if you like. I have read that if you want to keep this stink bomb for an extended period of time, it helps to store the egg in salt. I don't know for sure. I am sure when you throw or crush the egg you can expect the usual hydrogen sulfide stink and possibly some nasty odors of decay. This is probably your safest stink bomb. Hydrogen sulfide, which is the source of the famous "rotten egg smell" deadens your sense of smell and can be toxic in high doses. Your average rotten egg doesn't pose any major health hazard (unless you eat it), but in general you don't want to breathe in sulfur-based gases.

Nasty Burning Hair & Rubber Stink Bomb

If rotten eggs aren't stinky enough for you, you can wad up some hair (human hair, cat fur, dog hair... all equally disgusting), secure the hair with rubber bands, wrap the mass in notebook paper, and set it alight. Prank stink bombs usually release ammonium sulfide. It's fairly easy to make an ammonium sulfide stink bomb, but it's not as safe as throwing a rotten egg or burning hair.

Photo: Peter Cade, Getty Images
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